"The flight leaves in 3 hours and we are checking out of here in an hour so I'm going to run to the bakery on the corner and get you something special for breakfast Princess" Angus tells me when we are lying in bed Saturday morning. I packed my bag last night, leaving out my clothes that I will need for today, just need to shower and eat breakfast and go.
"Can I stay here or do you need me to come with you?" I ask him
"You can stay, I won't be long baby" He says as he throws clothes on quickly, he kisses me then leaves. I lay back and allow myself 5 minutes of serenity before my busy day begins but my serenity is broken by the buzzing of Angus' phone, in his hast to get dressed he forgot to grab it and now all I can hear is the vibration of the phone on the bedside table, I know who it is before I look at the screen but there's her name 'Steph Washington' destroying my serenity. The buzzing stops momentarily but starts again a minute later, she's just going to keep calling until it's answered I reason with myself so I pick up the phone and slide the screen to answer the call.
"Ugh about time Angus, seriously, you know I hate when you don't answer" She bellows into the phone
"This isn't Angus, it's his girlfriend actually. He's not here but I'll be sure to tell him you called" I say in a tone I don't even recognise
"Shit, sorry, I forgot he was with you, I'm glad he finally told you though" She says in her high pitched, singsong voice as I hear the keycard in the door, the door swings open and there is Angus.
"Baby, I forgot my..." He says as he comes in, then he sees me, his phone in my hand.
"Ah Steph, he's just walked back in" I tell her and hand the phone to Angus. There's a fire burning inside me, finally told me what exactly? That he is cheating on me with her? I storm off to the shower, alone, I don't want to hear their conversation, I'm just too angry, I'm angry at Steph for calling, I'm angry at Angus for hiding the calls from me but mostly I'm angry at myself for not speaking up sooner and now I look like the idiot girl who was in denial that her boyfriend was cheating on her.
The water is warm against my skin, it tingles and I let it wash over my face as I stand motionless under the rainfall shower head. I feel the tears escaping my eyes and I don't think I can stand up any longer, I crouch into a ball on the shower floor, placing my head on my knees, my hands under my legs and I let the sadness engulf me. I didn't even notice the water had stopped flowing until I feel the towel being wrapped around me. I pull my head up from my knees, my eyes sting from crying and my face is flush. He is sitting on the bathroom floor, knees pulled up to his chest, hands coving his face.
"It's not what you think" He says after a long silence
"What I think it is is that your ex girlfriend has been calling you for weeks and you've been hiding it from me" I say in a small voice, my fire has gone
"You knew?" He asks shocked, I stand up and dry myself off, step over him and walk out to where I left the clothes I forgot to grab before I stormed off. I dress myself quickly and I can feel that fire coming back.
"I guess you're not that good at covering your tracks" I yell at him
"Zoey I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry" He claims
"You thought hiding this from me wouldn't make me worry? Really?" I question him, "If you've done nothing wrong then you wouldn't have felt like you had to hide it from me, Hiding things is what deceitful people do, people who lie and cheat. Is it just phone calls or have you seen her too?" I stare at him, watching the colour drain from his face and the shame creep in.
"I saw her last week, we had coffee and talked. She knows about you, doesn't know details though like your name" His voice is small as he explains
"So she knows you're with me right now and she still keeps calling you?" I yell
"She didn't know we were here, I didn't tell her that and I haven't answered any calls from her while we've been here" He tells me
"That's so thoughtful, not telling your mistress that you've taken your girlfriend on holiday, I'm sure next week you'll fly her somewhere too, don't worry, I won't call you while you're with her, I'm respectful like that" I explode
"She is not my mistress Zoey, she is my friend" He yells at me
"Your friend? Wow, a few months ago you hated her and now you're friends?" Im shocked
"I never said I hated her, I hated what she did but I never hated her Zoey. I am here with you, I want to be with you" He pleads with me
"And what about when you're not with me Angus? I really only see you on the weekends, that's a lot of time in between and I know you" I scream
"So I must be fucking her then? That's what you're saying, that I'm fucking Steph because I spend time alone with her and because I'm a man who can't control himself. I spend time alone with Annabelle too, I guess I'm fucking her too and Tess, we are alone sometimes, I'm fucking Tess too" He yells at me, he picks up his phone and throws it hard at the wall, the phone hits the wall and it breaks in two and I stand there stunned, I have no more words. I grab my bag from the floor and storm out the door towards the elevator, I no longer want to look at him. I sit in the hotel lobby alone, I watch him exit the elevator, walk to the desk and check out, then walks up to me
"Let's go" He says in a sour tone
We drive to the airport in silence, not even the radio is on. I stare out the window, watching the palm trees and mansions pass. I'm not sad, just angry. I feel his hand touch my knee and squeeze it, I push his hand away from me, I want nothing to do with him and I'm not ready to let this go.
We arrive at the airport, check in and walk to the lounge. I fill a plate with toast, eggs, bacon and grab a glass of juice. I find a table and sit down, I'm exhausted from the fight, from the crying and the yelling. I see Angus standing at the buffet talking to a girl with dark hair, he points to me and dark haired girl turns around and I see that it's Cassie. She runs over to where I am and we hug tightly
"Zoey what are you doing here? I've missed you so much.Are you flying first class?" She has so many questions
"Zoey and I came on holidays here for a couple of days and yes, we are flying first class" Angus walks up behind Cassie, answering her questions
"This is awesome" She exclaims
"Do you want to swap seats on the flight Cassie?" Angus asks her
"You don't want to sit next to me?" I ask him, insulted slightly but not surprised
"I just thought since you and Cassie haven't seen each other in two weeks that you would appreciate catching up on a 3 hour flight. Plus I'm probably not going to be much company anyway, I've got reports and schedules to do" He explains to me and then turns to Cassie "Hold her hand on take off and tell her to keep breathing, she gets a bit scared with take off" He tells her.
"I was sitting next to my dad and all he does is talk business and I hate talking business so you saved me, Thanks Angus, you're the best" Cassie praises him, "Your boyfriend is the best Zoey" She tells me and I smile at her because if I don't smile I will cry.
We take our seats on the plane, me next to Cassie and Angus next to Mr Goth a few rows in front of us. I watch as Angus and Mortimer starts chatting, then laughing, across the row from them is Alexander, Cassie's younger brother and Bella Goth.
"What's been happening?" Cassie asks me, taking my hand, preparing for take off
"Not much, just came for a holiday and now going home" I tell her sadly
"Zoey?" She questions me
"I had a fight with Angus this morning, I think he's cheating on me with his ex" I break down
"Really?" She says shocked, "What happened?'
I give her all the details, the secret phone calls, how he had coffee with her, the fight and how he brought up about sleeping with Tess
"Zoey he wouldn't cheat on you with Tess" She tries to reassure me
"No but he would with his ex and the fact that he brought up Tess means that at some point he has thought about it, maybe he has some creepy twin fetish, I don't know, I feel like I don't know him at all and when we get off this plane I'm going to have to go back to his house and he's going to want to talk about his great new friendship with his ex girlfriend and then he'll act like I'm in the wrong for not understanding his great new friendship with his ex" I say quietly through tears, I don't want to create a scene on a plane full of strangers.
"Come back to my house, we will get ice cream and watch Buffy, kicking ass is comfort food remember?" Cassie offers
"Your parents won't mind will they?" I ask
"Not at all" She says and she squeezes my hand
We grab our bags from the carousel after landing, Cassie holds my hand for support as Angus approaches us.
"Ready to go home Princess?" He asks shyly, smile on his face, he thinks we've moved past the fight, that the 3 hours apart was enough time for me to calm down and get over it but I'm not over it, Im still angry, still hurt, still raw.
"I'm going to go home with Cassie" I tell him, I look at Cassie and give her a nod that it's ok if she steps away, she joins her family to tell them I'll be joining them. Angus looks at me with sadness in his eyes.
"Baby please, we can get through this. I want to spend tonight with you" He says, reaching out to touch my hand.
"Don't you dare fucking touch me or call me baby or Princess or any other cutesy name. I'm done Angus, I'm going home with Cassie and I want you to never contact me ever again. You want to talk about sleeping with Tess then you don't get to be in my life" I tell him, calmly, clearly, grab my bag and walk away from him, it's only when I'm standing with Cassie that the tears fall from my eyes, I will not let him see that he broke me.
"Can I stay here or do you need me to come with you?" I ask him
"You can stay, I won't be long baby" He says as he throws clothes on quickly, he kisses me then leaves. I lay back and allow myself 5 minutes of serenity before my busy day begins but my serenity is broken by the buzzing of Angus' phone, in his hast to get dressed he forgot to grab it and now all I can hear is the vibration of the phone on the bedside table, I know who it is before I look at the screen but there's her name 'Steph Washington' destroying my serenity. The buzzing stops momentarily but starts again a minute later, she's just going to keep calling until it's answered I reason with myself so I pick up the phone and slide the screen to answer the call.
"Ugh about time Angus, seriously, you know I hate when you don't answer" She bellows into the phone
"This isn't Angus, it's his girlfriend actually. He's not here but I'll be sure to tell him you called" I say in a tone I don't even recognise
"Shit, sorry, I forgot he was with you, I'm glad he finally told you though" She says in her high pitched, singsong voice as I hear the keycard in the door, the door swings open and there is Angus.
"Baby, I forgot my..." He says as he comes in, then he sees me, his phone in my hand.
"Ah Steph, he's just walked back in" I tell her and hand the phone to Angus. There's a fire burning inside me, finally told me what exactly? That he is cheating on me with her? I storm off to the shower, alone, I don't want to hear their conversation, I'm just too angry, I'm angry at Steph for calling, I'm angry at Angus for hiding the calls from me but mostly I'm angry at myself for not speaking up sooner and now I look like the idiot girl who was in denial that her boyfriend was cheating on her.
The water is warm against my skin, it tingles and I let it wash over my face as I stand motionless under the rainfall shower head. I feel the tears escaping my eyes and I don't think I can stand up any longer, I crouch into a ball on the shower floor, placing my head on my knees, my hands under my legs and I let the sadness engulf me. I didn't even notice the water had stopped flowing until I feel the towel being wrapped around me. I pull my head up from my knees, my eyes sting from crying and my face is flush. He is sitting on the bathroom floor, knees pulled up to his chest, hands coving his face.
"It's not what you think" He says after a long silence
"What I think it is is that your ex girlfriend has been calling you for weeks and you've been hiding it from me" I say in a small voice, my fire has gone
"You knew?" He asks shocked, I stand up and dry myself off, step over him and walk out to where I left the clothes I forgot to grab before I stormed off. I dress myself quickly and I can feel that fire coming back.
"I guess you're not that good at covering your tracks" I yell at him
"Zoey I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry" He claims
"You thought hiding this from me wouldn't make me worry? Really?" I question him, "If you've done nothing wrong then you wouldn't have felt like you had to hide it from me, Hiding things is what deceitful people do, people who lie and cheat. Is it just phone calls or have you seen her too?" I stare at him, watching the colour drain from his face and the shame creep in.
"I saw her last week, we had coffee and talked. She knows about you, doesn't know details though like your name" His voice is small as he explains
"So she knows you're with me right now and she still keeps calling you?" I yell
"She didn't know we were here, I didn't tell her that and I haven't answered any calls from her while we've been here" He tells me
"That's so thoughtful, not telling your mistress that you've taken your girlfriend on holiday, I'm sure next week you'll fly her somewhere too, don't worry, I won't call you while you're with her, I'm respectful like that" I explode
"She is not my mistress Zoey, she is my friend" He yells at me
"Your friend? Wow, a few months ago you hated her and now you're friends?" Im shocked
"I never said I hated her, I hated what she did but I never hated her Zoey. I am here with you, I want to be with you" He pleads with me
"And what about when you're not with me Angus? I really only see you on the weekends, that's a lot of time in between and I know you" I scream
"So I must be fucking her then? That's what you're saying, that I'm fucking Steph because I spend time alone with her and because I'm a man who can't control himself. I spend time alone with Annabelle too, I guess I'm fucking her too and Tess, we are alone sometimes, I'm fucking Tess too" He yells at me, he picks up his phone and throws it hard at the wall, the phone hits the wall and it breaks in two and I stand there stunned, I have no more words. I grab my bag from the floor and storm out the door towards the elevator, I no longer want to look at him. I sit in the hotel lobby alone, I watch him exit the elevator, walk to the desk and check out, then walks up to me
"Let's go" He says in a sour tone
We drive to the airport in silence, not even the radio is on. I stare out the window, watching the palm trees and mansions pass. I'm not sad, just angry. I feel his hand touch my knee and squeeze it, I push his hand away from me, I want nothing to do with him and I'm not ready to let this go.
We arrive at the airport, check in and walk to the lounge. I fill a plate with toast, eggs, bacon and grab a glass of juice. I find a table and sit down, I'm exhausted from the fight, from the crying and the yelling. I see Angus standing at the buffet talking to a girl with dark hair, he points to me and dark haired girl turns around and I see that it's Cassie. She runs over to where I am and we hug tightly
"Zoey what are you doing here? I've missed you so much.Are you flying first class?" She has so many questions
"Zoey and I came on holidays here for a couple of days and yes, we are flying first class" Angus walks up behind Cassie, answering her questions
"This is awesome" She exclaims
"Do you want to swap seats on the flight Cassie?" Angus asks her
"You don't want to sit next to me?" I ask him, insulted slightly but not surprised
"I just thought since you and Cassie haven't seen each other in two weeks that you would appreciate catching up on a 3 hour flight. Plus I'm probably not going to be much company anyway, I've got reports and schedules to do" He explains to me and then turns to Cassie "Hold her hand on take off and tell her to keep breathing, she gets a bit scared with take off" He tells her.
"I was sitting next to my dad and all he does is talk business and I hate talking business so you saved me, Thanks Angus, you're the best" Cassie praises him, "Your boyfriend is the best Zoey" She tells me and I smile at her because if I don't smile I will cry.
We take our seats on the plane, me next to Cassie and Angus next to Mr Goth a few rows in front of us. I watch as Angus and Mortimer starts chatting, then laughing, across the row from them is Alexander, Cassie's younger brother and Bella Goth.
"What's been happening?" Cassie asks me, taking my hand, preparing for take off
"Not much, just came for a holiday and now going home" I tell her sadly
"Zoey?" She questions me
"I had a fight with Angus this morning, I think he's cheating on me with his ex" I break down
"Really?" She says shocked, "What happened?'
I give her all the details, the secret phone calls, how he had coffee with her, the fight and how he brought up about sleeping with Tess
"Zoey he wouldn't cheat on you with Tess" She tries to reassure me
"No but he would with his ex and the fact that he brought up Tess means that at some point he has thought about it, maybe he has some creepy twin fetish, I don't know, I feel like I don't know him at all and when we get off this plane I'm going to have to go back to his house and he's going to want to talk about his great new friendship with his ex girlfriend and then he'll act like I'm in the wrong for not understanding his great new friendship with his ex" I say quietly through tears, I don't want to create a scene on a plane full of strangers.
"Come back to my house, we will get ice cream and watch Buffy, kicking ass is comfort food remember?" Cassie offers
"Your parents won't mind will they?" I ask
"Not at all" She says and she squeezes my hand
We grab our bags from the carousel after landing, Cassie holds my hand for support as Angus approaches us.
"Ready to go home Princess?" He asks shyly, smile on his face, he thinks we've moved past the fight, that the 3 hours apart was enough time for me to calm down and get over it but I'm not over it, Im still angry, still hurt, still raw.
"I'm going to go home with Cassie" I tell him, I look at Cassie and give her a nod that it's ok if she steps away, she joins her family to tell them I'll be joining them. Angus looks at me with sadness in his eyes.
"Baby please, we can get through this. I want to spend tonight with you" He says, reaching out to touch my hand.
"Don't you dare fucking touch me or call me baby or Princess or any other cutesy name. I'm done Angus, I'm going home with Cassie and I want you to never contact me ever again. You want to talk about sleeping with Tess then you don't get to be in my life" I tell him, calmly, clearly, grab my bag and walk away from him, it's only when I'm standing with Cassie that the tears fall from my eyes, I will not let him see that he broke me.
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